Fatty boom boom

Hey fatty boom boom! (Me talking to myself again.)Goodness gracious me my flabby bits seem to be multiplying quicker than a rat up a drain pipe. I mean I knew what I was getting my self into and let’s not beat about the bush I wasn’t exactly some sexy super model before getting myself into this situation but honestly it’s not a barrel of laughs being so big you can’t even get up in the morning without being pulled out of bed by a husband who finds it’s very humorous. It’s done nothing for my self confidence or self esteem but you have to laugh or you’d cry.

What is it with the growing body bits during pregnancy, do we not have a hard enough time of it without growing to the size of a small elephant. Everything is rapidly getting bigger and bigger so much so I won’t be able to fit out the front door if I get much bigger.

First things first is the most obvious thing about being pregnant the bump! The one thing I love about being pregnant the bump standing there front and center saying HELLO look at me look what I’m growing! No women should ever be ashamed or embarrassed about their bump, bumps are beautiful and should be embraced cherished and celebrated.

Now let’s get down to the nitty gritty… My bum moves in ways I’ve only ever seen a duck walk. Waddling along like only a duck would do, my sides most likely blobbing up and down like some rapid waves of the sea, and don’t even get my started on my double actually make that triple chin! Small children could take cover from the rain under the copious amounts of rolls forming under my face. If I wasn’t classed as morbidly obese before I certainly ain’t far off reaching that goal now!

And what’s going on with the bingo wings! I went to sleep one night and suddenly woke up an 80 year old flapping them arms around like nobody Is watching. I deffo have a lot of damage limitation to work on once I’ve popped this baby out. Don’t even get me started on the boobie situation! Seriously walking around all day with tits the size of France ain’t no mean feat! Taking that bra off at the end of the day runs the risk of putting 2 holes being put through my bedroom floor. The struggle is real guys, big boobies ain’t for the faint hearted and they ain’t just BIG they are hard as rocks and during cold weather feel like theve been sworn off with a rusty knife. Christ I’ve never known pain like it.

So to summerise I’m now basically a walking waddeling baby elephant with tits the size of a small country morphed with a duck blubbering up and down. And part of me worries about how I look all day evey day. Then the other half of me couldn’t give 2 shits because hey I’m pregnant and I’m allowed to be fat. Fortunately for me I’ve had some lovely compliments from a couple of people who have said i look really beautiful pregant. Which I must say really made me smile. Because who doesn’t love a cheeky little compliment especially when your not feeling your best.

So for now I’m going to continue waddling my big arse to becoming a big fatty fatty boom boom and worry about the flabby bits post birth. So untill next time…

Z

Xxx